Social Media is killing Social Skills

It is always the same in the middle of the night I cannot sleep. Tonight it is hot. I can not believe it is only April and it is this stinking hot out. Which you know when you are agitated there is nothing worse than being hot.  So what has got me hot under the collar tonight. I have broached this subject before but I think I am the only one reading or maybe just the only one that understands the message.

Social Media is killing human beings social skills. I know I have mentioned Emily Post before but if you are under 30 or even 40 or 80 and do not understand proper social etiquette maybe you should not be able to post things on the Internet. I have recently realized the only thing that has a better memory than me is the Internet. The Internet never forgets the stupid things you have said or done. So if you want to forget the stupid things you do in life do not post them on the Internet. Ever. Do not post stupid things your friends are doing. The stupid thing they did last night they may not want to remember or have their mom find out tomorrow. And for those of you that are the mothers and fathers of today's children please do not air your dirty laundry on the Internet for the amusement of others it is not amusing and when your children grow up and google your name do you want them to know how stupid you were or still are.

I have been tossing around the idea on giving up on FB friends and letting go of something I sometimes enjoy and other times despise. Do I let go of everything or just the people that make me this upset? I feel like I must refer back to the beginning when I started to write this blog that I gave myself rules and I shared some of my life rules which have served me well for these last 40 odd years. So rule Number One: Never Go Back. So if I cut the ties with you tonight or tomorrow there is probably no turning back for me. Or there is the clean slate. Delete everyone and start fresh. Just remove the people that make me mad. See I don't have a problem with people having a different opinion than mine if it is valid or if you are going to be an idiot be an idiot towards everyone. So everyone knows you are an idiot. What you do not realize is that this is not the first time we have been at this cross roads. You have been there with others before and they have either deleted you or blocked you. Which are both viable options. I keep giving you another chance and another chance and you just don't seem to get it. My friendship is valuable and at some point I think yours was to but now we are at a point I don't really think we are or ever were really friends. Mostly because you don't think that my feelings matter or those that are close to me.

See how vague I am being it is because my first rule in blogging was not to use any one's name and to never be hurtful directly to another person. If you think this is about you well pick up an Emily Post book and rethink your life. But odds are with me on this one. If this is about you, well you would never imagine that it could be about you because you have never spoken anything but the truth and if the truth hurts well you don't give a crap about that either.

I think the thing that bothers me the most is how self serving some people can be. I have friends that I never would have thought to be friends until I saw some of the things they post. They share their heart. Now I know that everything in the world is not sunshine and roses and I am not saying don't share when it is not but really everyday of your life does not suck and if it does change it. I try like hell to change myself for the better and over the years because I remember I know I am now better than I was 20 years ago. I know I still have faults to work on but I try. And some days I fail. Today is not going to be a failure. So if you think moving on is right for you that is fine move on. Delete me or remove yourself and by a journal. Please. Save me from deleting you. I try really hard to not give up on you to hope there is good in your heart but if there is not. Well at least now we are both clear on that.

See I always post a link to my blog on the old FB but not today. This is a self serving blog and I am going to get the guilty pleasure of not sharing it with you. If you found it great and if not your loss.

Happy Anniversary Blog!

Since I have an hour of peace before I have to start getting ready for work I thought I would start on my one year anniversary blog entry.  So the first thing I thought I would do is look back and see how I have done.

I have written 45 blogs all but 2 have been published. I don't know if I will ever finish them or move on past them. Of the 45 I have written I have 2 different blogs. Day One the first I started with my rules and my poem,For the Love of Lilly. I have used that for world news and views of the world and the people who share this planet with me. The second is Sunshine and Shadows. This blog is a reflection of myself. I write about my relationships with friends, family and my values, memories and travels.

When I sat down today I wanted to check out some statistics on blogging. I found one site that says 60% of bloggers are guys. Only 40% girls. Guess that is not bad. Even though adult women between 21 and 35 read over 50% of the blogs. Most that write blogs do not make money from them even the ones with advertising. I do not have advertising. No subtle mention of some product I do not believe in. Anything I talk about is all me.

One of the pages I read said write about a subject you know about and like and that you should write a draft then sleep on it and make changes the following day. For the most part when I am writing I sit down to start I will stay in the chair until I am finished. I am usually home alone. It is easier for me to think without interruptions. I have my satellite radio playing a station with no commercials that plays Pop, Rock and Folk music. A pleasant mix I can sing along with.

Usually the reason I sit down to write is that something is in my head and I can not let it go. I find it easiest to write it out and share it than to keep it inside. I do have a few subjects that are inside that bubble to the top but I don't know if I am ever going to share. And some of you may think what the heck could it be. You'll just have to wait and see. I have tried to stick with my rules I began with. I try not to talk about others at least not directly. I have written blogs for, or should I say to friends. Even when it is not my situation the opinion I am writing about is all mine. Brian is the first to hear my blog. I read it out loud to him. I listen to his opinion but I am going to write what I am going to write. I just don't want to hurt anyone.


I have had over 1750 hits to my blogs. I am still amazed by all the places that people have read my blog from: US, Russia, Germany, Sweden,  Philippines, United Kingdom, Netherlands, France, Indonesia, Israel, Malaysia and Poland my newest.

The countries are listed in order of hits.  I am still amazed by the number of people and where they are from. I want to say Thank you to all of you for reading along. I am not sure how many have read all of my blog posts or just one. Either way if you walk away thinking then I have done my job. All I want out of my blogs is a good nights sleep. It may seem crazy but that is usually what I get. My conscious is clear and my mind is no longer cluttered with worry or anxiety. 

In the next few weeks I have thought about starting another blog. I have 2 ideas one has to do with places named for people and what they did to get a park or street named for them. The other is to write about books that I have read. Not ones that are popular today but older books. Some of my favorites have been older books. Maybe not considered classics but still well worth the read. If you have an opinion or a favorite book or place you want to know about let me know. It may help me make my decision. I will still continue Sunshine & Shadows. It has earned a place in my heart and I hope yours.

Blogging Update

So, if you have been following along for the past few months I have spilled my guts in the middle of the night just to get things off my mind. Tonight I am working on another project that if I didn't feel so sick it would drive me to drink. Kidding. I am however sick. So while sitting up tonight I thought I would review some of what I have written and looked back at who has been reading along. In November I did a blog on blogging and offered the opportunity for anyone that would like to share to post and as long as it was appropriate by my standards I would publish it. Well no takers. The offer is always open. So I thought I would share where a few friends and a blogging website has taken me. We are almost to 600 views in the last 5 months on this blog.

I find that to be amazing. Tonight I looked at the map again to see where my readers are from and found some new people are reading along that I do not know.

The top spot is of course the USA.

2. Philippines
3. Sweden
4. Germany
5. United Kingdom
6. France
7. Russia
8. Israel

By the way if I don't know you can post a comment and let me know how you came to find me.

I would like to thank the readers that read along and if you are my friend and reading glad to have you in my life. If it wasn't for real friends and Brian these last 8 months would have been unbearable. If by chance somehow you are reading and find yourself in a terrible place and you do not know how to get out or resolve the problem. Seek help. You are not alone. There are other people that can help you find the answers you are looking for. But the worst thing you can do is try to get through a bad thing by yourself.  Sometimes you need a friend to drag you through it or out of it. And if you don't have a friend let me know. I am a good listener as well.

Happy and Healthy 2013

Blogging

I received an email that I have been thinking about since I got it. The person had received a link to my blog and in return replied and said,

"I don’t do blogs, sorry, to much time without enough results.
I like to talk with people as a group to get feedback like on facebook not talk at people like on twitter or a blog."

Well I disagree. Time vs Results. The reason I write this blog is selfish. I never thought that anyone other than my close friends would be reading what I write. And as those of you that are close to me know I do not do many things that are selfish. Writing has been therapeutic and a relief from some of my memories. So the result has been that I come up with ideas on things to write about and they morph into something else.

I consider the feelings of audience and of those I am writing about.  I have always felt that Facebook and Twitter are the opposite that people say whatever they feel and never consider the feelings of others or how permanent their words are. And as a customer told me the other day at work. I am stupid when it comes to twitter. Again I just find that to be a way to blurt out a thought at the spur of the moment. Without any thought to the result.

Well enough about that comment. It does tie into the subject which is who I reach. I post a link on Facebook when I finish a posting and send an email to some friends but in return I get comments via email and the Blogger software actually shows me where in the world people have read my blog.

I love the comments. Another selfish act. Everyone likes to hear that they do a good job and that they have touched someones heart or head with a comment. I have always been one who works best when I receive praise. Though at times criticism sometimes causes me to try that much harder to succeed. But the map has been an amazing piece of information as well. I copy a couple of Brian's cousins that live in Sweden on my blog and based on the map they have read some of my posts. But a few weeks ago I glanced at the map and noticed France was highlighted, and on another post Germany and yet another was England but the one that got me was when Russia was highlighted.

This has made me realize that no longer am I selfishly writing for my self and sharing feelings with a few friends, which made me think if you the reader could say anything to the whole world what would you say. And since as my opposition believes there is no give and take in Blogging I would like to prove him wrong again. So please consider the feelings of the readers and those you write about. I try not to use names for just that reason.  So give it some thought and Post a comment. Share with me something you would like to get off your chest or out of your head. I in return will let you know how many people have read and where in the world your thoughts have reached.

Thank you all for reading my words and helping me through this time in my life.

And to my husband. Happy Anniversary babe.