Pretty funny title. So I must give credit. Brian is the one that said it should be the name of this post. This could become its very own blog.
Yesterday and today are my days off and after not doing much of anything yesterday I decided I was going to take a shower and do something. So this is what happens when my brain does not turn off. I am going to describe what goes through my mind before the hot water runs out.
See when I was a kid my mom used to say I did not need to use soap when I bathed because I took such a hot bath that a would scald the dirt right off me. I did and have always used soap but this is something my mother would say. Anyhow here is the what happened in my head.
As I undressed I thought "Why do women's bras have a bow on them". That would be a good name for a book. Who wouldn't pick that up? I can see the dust jacket on the back it would have reviews all from women named Jane Russell. Get it. A book about the bow on a bra and reviewed by women named Jane Russell. You would have to be over the age of 45 to get the reference.
Since Brian did not get this reference I will only tell you Jane Russell was a movie star and she used to do Playtex 18 hour bra commercials. Get it now? Pretty damn funny.
Back to the shower.
Six degrees of separation to Kevin Bacon and I can go from a bow on a bra to Jane Russell to my best friend in band in high school was Jane Russell. Not the bra lady but my friend's name was also Jane Russell. Jane and I were only friends for a few years she was a year older than me and after she graduated we did not see each other anymore but while we were friends we did so much stuff together. Jane taught me to drive a stick shift in her old VW station wagon on my 16th birthday that gear shift did not have a ball so it would leave a mark on your hand from shifting gears. We would drive around and listen to Bonnie Tyler tapes. Jane owned a horse but we only went to see it together once. Jane worked at Maas Brothers. Her mom was the Music Director at Trinity Presbyterian Church. The first time I went to church with her I sang in the choir and at that church during the service they ask who is new and call them up to the front to welcome them. I remember Jane pushing me to go and the Pastor made a big deal that it was my first time attending their church and I sang with the choir. We also would stand in for people in bell choir for practice and we were in a play at her church. Listen People was the name of it. All of this while I was a junior and she was a senior. Band camp was at a church camp up near Moon Lake that year. We had so much fun. Getting in trouble or causing trouble which ever was easier that day. Wish I knew how she is doing. Never can find her when I check on FB. There are just too many Jane Russell's in the world and I have no idea what she did after she graduated. Man I miss her.
Well we are to the point that I am turning off the cold water because the hot is not hot enough anymore and I really need to finish taking a shower so I can do something. Think I am going to take Princess for a walk.
So I know it kinda jumps around but that is what my brain does. I think it could be why sometimes I feel tired even when I have done nothing. My brain does not stop. Now I have learned over the last few years I can do breathing exercises and slow it down and for a time may even stop jumping from one thing to another.
Just thought I would share.
Have a great day. I have already taken my shower for today and ready to go.
Wednesday, February 26, 2014
Wednesday, February 19, 2014
Are you smart or just a smart ass?
So I thought I knew this week what I would write about. I was sure I was going to write about the Olympics and the way people treat each other for the sake of ratings or whatever it is that drives people to say something that is totally not necessary on television. I know millions were watching. I know we were probably the only ones that turned the channel and watched something else. I am not a sports person. I am really not that competitive. I like to win but sometimes just knowing I am good at something is good enough for me. That is perfect.
See when I was young I worked for Eckerd and I was not afraid to be right and it did not matter who I was talking to. The District Manager came in once and told me that my price changes were not up to date. I did not say I will get on that. I took him to the book and showed him that what was on the shelf was correct and that I had initialed myself that it was done because I knew I was right. I did not care that he was with his boss. I did not care who was standing there. The man told me I was wrong. That was not the last time I would do such a thing. No one ever told me not to until I had made my mark on everyone. So as I got older and I applied for a promotion as a Service Assistant and my DM asked me why I should get the job. Well there was only one reason because I bleed blue (the color of the trim in the store and the name was always as we called it Eckerd Blue). Those were my exact words. I knew this DM. He had been a Pharmacist for years and I had worked for him. Funny thing was I had always called him Phil as a Pharmacist but now as a DM people thought I should call him Mr. S... I did not get this. How did our relationship change because he got a promotion. I was taught to work side by side with your people until they did the job as best they could then let them go on their own. That was how I taught people how to straighten shoes and hats and fill the coolers. Seemed when you put this divide you were no longer working with someone, now you are working for them. Not the same. Can you go tell someone you work for the same thing you tell someone you work with. Not usually.
So Phil he did promote me to Service Assistant. I had been with Eckerd now for about 10 years and I made more money hourly as a Service Assistant than most Assistant Managers but you know that girl that was 16, 17 or even 20 that said whatever she wanted is now 26 and can not get promoted to save my life. It has became a quest. I was put in some terrible stores but made the best of them. Worked in a store that was one of the companies oldest with a manager that had been the golden child but as all do somehow fell from the Grace of the company. But we made the best of this old store that we could and when it was time to close the store we were there to the last day. Then after that I spent time in Gulfport. This is a small town along the water near south St. Petersburg. On the verge of a beautiful waterfront community and the otherside of the railroad tracks set a small plaza with a Winn Dixie and an Eckerd. This store was as small as can be. So small we had to get the truck in the morning before the store open because it had to be unloaded through the front door. I worked with an Asst Manager and we share the responsibility of opening and closing the store doing all the ordering and payroll but no title for me. A store manager came in once every couple weeks and left a list of what she wanted to see done. Otherwise we ran the store as we saw fit. Now this Asst. Jimmy he had an older brother who was a manager for Eckerd. His brother would come in all the time and tell me I should be promoted and he said he would help me get promoted. I thought great. I have to get transferred to South St. Pete to find someone who does not know my reputation or doesn't care. So either way I had been at this store for months and Jimmy got transferred. Now it is me and another Service Asst. Her and I did not get along. Still had the Manager checking in on us. Now I had been there for almost 8 months and it is almost time for inventory and I have gotten most of the backroom ready by myself and working on the ledge. I thought if I get this store through inventory, I don't have anything to prove to anyone. I know I can do this job with or without the pay or the title and I am. So 2 days before inventory the Manager in charge came in and said that I did not have enough done and that she was going to have to bring someone else in to help get ready for inventory. That was crazy. It did not matter what list she left I would have gotten it done and I knew she was not right. But that afternoon I got transferred to another store in St. Pete. Now I am working for Jimmy's brother Rob. I was pissed.
But like everything else with Eckerd it was another grain of salt that was probably my own fault because of my smart mouth. Rob and I worked together like crazy. This store was right on US 19 and busy and huge. This was a store that probably could have used 2 Asst Managers but all Rob got was me. But he did have faith in me. As we came into the holidays he said I can give you overtime as long as everything is good in the store. So we kept the store up and I was working 50 hours a week or more depending on how busy. This store the pharmacy was busy and when someone came in I would go back and type for the pharmacist or answer the phone or whatever they needed. That is what I was taught to do. One day Rob walked by the pharmacy and looked up and said I thought you went home I said, no there was a line and well here I am.
As it got closer to holidays we were working so much when I walked in the door one day I said Hi, honey I am home. I was not sure why I was driving home just to get back up and come back in the morning but that was what it was taking. Well you knew the day would come didn't you. I mean I am still a Service Asst and really I know more about Eckerds than a lot of the managers out there but you know there I was. So on the phone the week before Thanksgiving was the DM calling for me? Rob was not there. Well now of course this is not Phil he was not the DM in that area but this DM he didn't like me at all. So he called to tell me he was promoting me. Well of course he is. I have over 60 hours on the schedule for next week and I can make more money than Rob and I think this is what finally did it. The dollar wins, or did I or did they. I am not sure. How come I feel defeated for getting promoted. Years, I worked hard. Year after year. Rob was proud like a father who's child finished kindergarten but I was frustrated.
Now I would not work with Rob much longer. I would get hurt at a work party at another store in St. Pete during a remodel the same day my store got robbed. The same day another Asst Manager was killed being robbed leaving the store that night. Not really a good day in Eckerd.
Where are we going here. Hard work and perseverance does not always get you what you want, or sometimes what you want is not what you need? I am not sure.
So for the big tie in. Olympians are people too. They work really hard for years for their goals. And sometimes they get a gold and sometimes they don't. Sometimes the story is pretty but the finish isn't. Sometimes the finish is pretty and the story is not. Everything is not a made for tv mini-series. These people have to go on and live a lifetime after these games are over. Some of them are going to retire from a sport they have done since they were 4 and they are now 24 or 34. Either way they have so many good years to live and their whole life is not summed up on the podium today. It will be summed up 30 or so years from now when they are showing their medal or telling the story of the one that got away to their grandchildren. And they can write the chapters afterwards knowing they did the best they could while competing and will continue in that same fashion whatever job they choose in life.
Now for the sideline reporter that ticked me off and the analyst that irritated me, I will assume you are past your prime in your sport and these are not your finest moments either and you to will go on to do better with your live and learn that knowing everything does not get you everything and being the smartest person in the class and being a smart ass are not the same thing. I know now. I was both when it came to a lot of things but sometimes I should have just kept my mouth shut.
See when I was young I worked for Eckerd and I was not afraid to be right and it did not matter who I was talking to. The District Manager came in once and told me that my price changes were not up to date. I did not say I will get on that. I took him to the book and showed him that what was on the shelf was correct and that I had initialed myself that it was done because I knew I was right. I did not care that he was with his boss. I did not care who was standing there. The man told me I was wrong. That was not the last time I would do such a thing. No one ever told me not to until I had made my mark on everyone. So as I got older and I applied for a promotion as a Service Assistant and my DM asked me why I should get the job. Well there was only one reason because I bleed blue (the color of the trim in the store and the name was always as we called it Eckerd Blue). Those were my exact words. I knew this DM. He had been a Pharmacist for years and I had worked for him. Funny thing was I had always called him Phil as a Pharmacist but now as a DM people thought I should call him Mr. S... I did not get this. How did our relationship change because he got a promotion. I was taught to work side by side with your people until they did the job as best they could then let them go on their own. That was how I taught people how to straighten shoes and hats and fill the coolers. Seemed when you put this divide you were no longer working with someone, now you are working for them. Not the same. Can you go tell someone you work for the same thing you tell someone you work with. Not usually.
So Phil he did promote me to Service Assistant. I had been with Eckerd now for about 10 years and I made more money hourly as a Service Assistant than most Assistant Managers but you know that girl that was 16, 17 or even 20 that said whatever she wanted is now 26 and can not get promoted to save my life. It has became a quest. I was put in some terrible stores but made the best of them. Worked in a store that was one of the companies oldest with a manager that had been the golden child but as all do somehow fell from the Grace of the company. But we made the best of this old store that we could and when it was time to close the store we were there to the last day. Then after that I spent time in Gulfport. This is a small town along the water near south St. Petersburg. On the verge of a beautiful waterfront community and the otherside of the railroad tracks set a small plaza with a Winn Dixie and an Eckerd. This store was as small as can be. So small we had to get the truck in the morning before the store open because it had to be unloaded through the front door. I worked with an Asst Manager and we share the responsibility of opening and closing the store doing all the ordering and payroll but no title for me. A store manager came in once every couple weeks and left a list of what she wanted to see done. Otherwise we ran the store as we saw fit. Now this Asst. Jimmy he had an older brother who was a manager for Eckerd. His brother would come in all the time and tell me I should be promoted and he said he would help me get promoted. I thought great. I have to get transferred to South St. Pete to find someone who does not know my reputation or doesn't care. So either way I had been at this store for months and Jimmy got transferred. Now it is me and another Service Asst. Her and I did not get along. Still had the Manager checking in on us. Now I had been there for almost 8 months and it is almost time for inventory and I have gotten most of the backroom ready by myself and working on the ledge. I thought if I get this store through inventory, I don't have anything to prove to anyone. I know I can do this job with or without the pay or the title and I am. So 2 days before inventory the Manager in charge came in and said that I did not have enough done and that she was going to have to bring someone else in to help get ready for inventory. That was crazy. It did not matter what list she left I would have gotten it done and I knew she was not right. But that afternoon I got transferred to another store in St. Pete. Now I am working for Jimmy's brother Rob. I was pissed.
But like everything else with Eckerd it was another grain of salt that was probably my own fault because of my smart mouth. Rob and I worked together like crazy. This store was right on US 19 and busy and huge. This was a store that probably could have used 2 Asst Managers but all Rob got was me. But he did have faith in me. As we came into the holidays he said I can give you overtime as long as everything is good in the store. So we kept the store up and I was working 50 hours a week or more depending on how busy. This store the pharmacy was busy and when someone came in I would go back and type for the pharmacist or answer the phone or whatever they needed. That is what I was taught to do. One day Rob walked by the pharmacy and looked up and said I thought you went home I said, no there was a line and well here I am.
As it got closer to holidays we were working so much when I walked in the door one day I said Hi, honey I am home. I was not sure why I was driving home just to get back up and come back in the morning but that was what it was taking. Well you knew the day would come didn't you. I mean I am still a Service Asst and really I know more about Eckerds than a lot of the managers out there but you know there I was. So on the phone the week before Thanksgiving was the DM calling for me? Rob was not there. Well now of course this is not Phil he was not the DM in that area but this DM he didn't like me at all. So he called to tell me he was promoting me. Well of course he is. I have over 60 hours on the schedule for next week and I can make more money than Rob and I think this is what finally did it. The dollar wins, or did I or did they. I am not sure. How come I feel defeated for getting promoted. Years, I worked hard. Year after year. Rob was proud like a father who's child finished kindergarten but I was frustrated.
Now I would not work with Rob much longer. I would get hurt at a work party at another store in St. Pete during a remodel the same day my store got robbed. The same day another Asst Manager was killed being robbed leaving the store that night. Not really a good day in Eckerd.
Where are we going here. Hard work and perseverance does not always get you what you want, or sometimes what you want is not what you need? I am not sure.
So for the big tie in. Olympians are people too. They work really hard for years for their goals. And sometimes they get a gold and sometimes they don't. Sometimes the story is pretty but the finish isn't. Sometimes the finish is pretty and the story is not. Everything is not a made for tv mini-series. These people have to go on and live a lifetime after these games are over. Some of them are going to retire from a sport they have done since they were 4 and they are now 24 or 34. Either way they have so many good years to live and their whole life is not summed up on the podium today. It will be summed up 30 or so years from now when they are showing their medal or telling the story of the one that got away to their grandchildren. And they can write the chapters afterwards knowing they did the best they could while competing and will continue in that same fashion whatever job they choose in life.
Now for the sideline reporter that ticked me off and the analyst that irritated me, I will assume you are past your prime in your sport and these are not your finest moments either and you to will go on to do better with your live and learn that knowing everything does not get you everything and being the smartest person in the class and being a smart ass are not the same thing. I know now. I was both when it came to a lot of things but sometimes I should have just kept my mouth shut.
Wednesday, February 5, 2014
Choices
I went yesterday to see the movie August-Osage County. I think I was looking for dark and funny and found it to be more dark and sad and less funny. I was there in the afternoon on a weekday so the audience was older and some were not happy. They did not like the language and did not like the subject matter. I could have done without some of the language but to be this dark somebody is going to say the F word. I get the story everyone in the movie except for the hired help comes to the house with their own personal secret and tragedy going on in their lives but now Dad is gone and Mom has cancer and is addicted to pain meds. And we haven't even started to scratch the surface of this families secrets. But I get that. I get that everyone has something they bring to the table. In the movie they literally bring it to the dining room table during the funeral dinner for their father. The scene that got me was the three sisters trying to decide what is going to happen with their mom. Do we send her to rehab, a home or will someone draw the short straw and have to stay and take care of her. While at the table 2 of the 3 say they are leaving and the one who has stuck around through this much says she can't and won't do it any longer. Which leaves the oldest. Daddy's little girl is stuck holding the bag with mom. As the movie draws to a close each sister leaves the house in tears because their own drama takes them away the last one is told that she is just like her mother. Standing there midday in her pajamas and what is next. She gets mad and takes off in the family truck the movie ends she has stopped along an open Oklahoma road and gets out of the truck she looks back towards home and forward away from that mess. She gets back in the truck and I was not sure which way she would go, but in the end she has to make the choice for herself. No one is going to make it for her this time.
So I know I gave away a lot but there is a lot more cussing in the movie. A lot of sadness in this family. More drama than any family I know. But you know all fiction has a hint of the truth hidden inside it. Everyone in all families face decisions they don't want to make and sometimes you make the choice and sometimes you wait long enough and the choice is made for you. Not sure which is less painful. Do you want to believe you choose to leave your mom alone or do you want to believe you have no other choice.? That is what I left with. And no matter who or what it is, I am like a Marine. No man left behind. So no matter what I have to do I am going to drag my mom or anyone else to a point where they can take care of themselves or someone else steps up to help.
But as you can see it is about choices today and I made one the other night at work. It was not a big choice when I made it. It was really a simple choice when I made it but in the end I was the one who made the choice and someone else had to work later than he should have because of it. I have played out the way things went down and how they could have been different in my head so many times but I still see the end result being the same but I would not have been the one making the call it would have been someone else. I am mentioning this to get it out of my head. This is the sort of thing that sticks with me until something else does. So as I finish my weekend off I will go back to work tomorrow with a clear conscience and will make good choices even though I know they will not always be right they will be all mine.
So I know I gave away a lot but there is a lot more cussing in the movie. A lot of sadness in this family. More drama than any family I know. But you know all fiction has a hint of the truth hidden inside it. Everyone in all families face decisions they don't want to make and sometimes you make the choice and sometimes you wait long enough and the choice is made for you. Not sure which is less painful. Do you want to believe you choose to leave your mom alone or do you want to believe you have no other choice.? That is what I left with. And no matter who or what it is, I am like a Marine. No man left behind. So no matter what I have to do I am going to drag my mom or anyone else to a point where they can take care of themselves or someone else steps up to help.
But as you can see it is about choices today and I made one the other night at work. It was not a big choice when I made it. It was really a simple choice when I made it but in the end I was the one who made the choice and someone else had to work later than he should have because of it. I have played out the way things went down and how they could have been different in my head so many times but I still see the end result being the same but I would not have been the one making the call it would have been someone else. I am mentioning this to get it out of my head. This is the sort of thing that sticks with me until something else does. So as I finish my weekend off I will go back to work tomorrow with a clear conscience and will make good choices even though I know they will not always be right they will be all mine.
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