Wounds reopened

Well after 11 months of trying to heal I feel like I just ripped the band-aid off the one of the worst cuts ever and it hurts like hell.

I just had a thought at the beginning of April that next month will be a year since this bout with Hell started for us. That same day Brian received a call from a reporter that wanted to do a story to see how we are doing a year later.

These are not the memories that I wanted to dredge up or share more than I already have but we have agreed.

So in this last week we have again not slept. I have felt sad and helpless and useless when it comes to this situation.

At first I thought this would be a good way to open up the lines of communication. Remind people their struggles do not have to end like Lisa's. That there is help.

But then I think I would do anything for anyone yet I didn't think I needed to do something for her. This really hurts.

I do want to help others but the price I pay in my own pain is not good. I do not want to fall back to a place where I can not pull myself back out.

As I review my own blogs I read them as though I am just writing them and the emotions are fresh again.

So I have decided over the next few weeks I am going to take a look at some of the feelings and tie them back to blogs I have written this year. As I do if something seems to hit you as important or reminds you of a friend that you thought is ok but may not be. Pass on the information. Share it on Facebook or send a text but let them know that there is help. That is the key and I don't care if they have to call me direct to find out they are worth it and their life is important. No one should be tortured or threatened.

To end today 7 signs to look for in domestic violence.(Pass them on and do not tolerate them.)

1. Jealousy that goes too far. (If you can not see or talk to a friend.)
2. Using violence or the threat of violence to control you.
3. Abusing animals.
4. Throwing things and punching the wall.
5. A child of domestic violence believes that these are normal behaviors.
6. Access to weapons.
7. Drug and Alcohol abuse as an excuse for the violent behavior. (It may be two separate problems but they are tied together.)