Showing posts with label Fate. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Fate. Show all posts

Wednesday, May 27, 2015

Fate

Today I learned something new about fate. Well, new to me. Fate is as old as Greek Mythology. Fate is a family business. Three sisters that control destiny.  Three sisters. I have three sisters. I do not think they were the three sisters mythology was talking about.  So as I learned this morning  these three sisters hold the thread of life. The first is the spinner of the thread when a baby is born and the second is the one that measured the length of thread and the third she cut the thread when one dies.

As some believe these three come to a new baby on the third night after being born and determine the child's fate. This is an interesting idea for me the worrier. I know they say you can beat fate but I have seen all the Final Destination movies. I knew right away in the first once you hear John Denver music it is all over for you. But there were a few that beat their fate but sooner or later I guess those sisters right the wrong that has happened and they get you. As the saying goes if you can't beat them, join them. So why worry. I make my choices and try to make everything right but in the end the end is the end and I can not change it. This may seem fatalistic. See look there is the word fate. stuck at the beginning. So today I want to write about some fate that I feel has been for the better. See sometimes when things happen it could seem terrible but in the end it was what had to happen so that the stars could align for something else to happen. That is how I think of fate.

Two things made me start thinking about this last night. I just recently dropped off a wedding album to a dear friend of mine who got married a month ago.I was so glad I could share his special moment with him and his new wife and family. Small wedding at the courthouse then we went to the Botanical Gardens and took some beautiful pictures. The next day they had a barbecue picnic reception. It was great to see old friends that we had not seen in a while and new family members. So the fate that got us to that point I guess now that I know the definition is not fate but maybe Devine intervention. But when I got fired from my last job she was the person they hired. And that is how he and she met. See I had to loose my job so she could get the job so they could meet and get married. That was a lot of work to get those two together. Now I have always said that loosing that job was the best thing that ever happened to me. Well now that makes three.

The second thing that had me thinking about Fate last night was that at work I had my monthly review. Now if I go back over the last year I have cried during more of these reviews than I care to admit but over the last few months no tears. It was not that I was upset by what they said it was the fear of what they could say. See for a long time I have still lived in fear of whomever is speaking to me from a boss point of view because of the boss at that job that I got fired from. Well my last supervisor who is the boss type that scares some people. I told him I like a boss that tells it like it is. I used to work for an awesome lady at Eckerd that most would have not wanted for a boss but for me I liked that as long as you did what you were supposed to be doing she left you to do it. If you had a question you better ask that was what she was there for and when you made a mistake she let you know. Well this last supervisor of mine was very similar in his ways. And he encouraged me to be more self confident and after the last shift bid which I cried because I was worried I would not get the shift I needed so I could still take care of my mom on Fridays like I have been for the last year. I got the days off but have had to work until 10 which gave me extra time at night when it was slow to take some online classes which Bright house offers. I decided that I would take ones that had to do with self confidence and with working with different types of people. I have taken 16 such courses over the last 5 months and I have seen a noticeable difference in my perception of others around me and of myself. I have learned about traits that I have and how to resolve conflicts better and how not to be defensive when someone is being critical and how to take ownership of my own mistakes and move on. Not to dwell on them.  So the supervisor I have now only recently got promoted to supervisor and she has take me on with the approach to help build my self confidence by reassuring me that I do a good job almost daily. Both of them have encouraged me to do things that I might have not wanted to do but only because I lacked the confidence to do it. So as we started to go over my six month review she asked me first how I thought I did. I told her I thought I meet expectations but could do better. I do enough to get by but should be able to do more. Just getting by. She said really. Just getting by. Well then she said what my rank was for this shift bid and I was surprised. I thought I would be in the middle of the pack hopefully ranked high enough to still have my Friday Saturday off so I could still help my mom. But ready to deal with whatever came my way. No tears of worry. Just gonna do what I have to do to get things taken care of. Then she told me that I do not just skate by that I do an outstanding job not just a meets. So I got to pick the shift I wanted and no tears were shed. I get embarrassed as people say things that are good about me. To me it is just doing my job nothing extra. But she assured me that it is and that the classes I have taken have helped me a lot at work.

A lot of things have come together recently for me both in my head and in real life. They are two totally different things. In my head I usually go through every worse case scenario before whatever is going to happen happens and then realize that it is not always going to be the bad thing that is going to happen. Sometimes as with recently there are good things going to happen. I am glad I am more receptive to the good things and worry less about what could happen.

So I am good with the three sisters of Fate. They have already spun my thread and measured its length now I have to do the best I can with the time I have and not worry about hearing the John Denver music. When it comes it comes.

Tuesday, March 18, 2014

Sand Collar or Diamond Ring?

Sometimes I have the strangest thoughts and search something on the Internet and find the strangest things. One day just wondering what would come up I searched my maiden name on eBay. Just wondered if there was a picture of someone related or what would come up. The weirdest thing. I was expecting something from Ohio where my father is from with the family name or business on it. But instead I found a picture of my youngest sister. She and two other kids at craft contest had one a prize and this picture was run in the news paper. As soon as I saw the picture I knew it was her but kept thinking how weird that is. What are the odds. Well with me it seems to happen often. I think about something and then out of no where I see whatever I just said I never see this anymore.

This same thing happened one night years ago Brian and I were walking on the beach and I had just told him how we used to find the sand collars when we were kids and I had not seen one of them in years. We did not walk another 20 feet and there was one right in front of us. Brian's answer was why don't you think about how long it has been since you found a diamond ring or a pile of cash. This is my luck and fate at play. Rarely is cash going to be involved. Of course we have had times when paying the bills I have wondered how I was going to pay them all and then a check would come for a refund I forgot or an over payment I did not know I had made but for the most part it is just strange things.

So I have been thinking about some ideas to write children's history books. Just short stories about people or places that we have been. I have thought about telling them from different perspectives and I have been working on this idea of instead of telling the story from a child's point of view or an adults to tell the story from a plant or tree's point of view. I have had idea's for a few different places and people but today I thought about a tree in Clearwater that has been there as long as I can remember and I knew there was a plaque in front of the tree so today I stopped next to Perkins on Gulf to Bay near US 19 and wanted to check out the tree and the plaque. So the tree I thought was an Oak is actually a Camphor tree. And even though the tree looks big as you drive by if you have ever noticed. It is even bigger when I was standing in front of it. I would say it was 20 or 30 ft around. The plaque just says that it is a Camphor tree and it is in appreciation for the people who saved it from the National Arbor Society and dated February 1975. Took a few pictures and came home.

Now today I was supposed to do just a few things clean the counter and the dining room table which are catch all. Basically throw out the trash on the table and put everything else away. Do some laundry and the dishes and make dinner. But no. First visited my dad. Then went to the store. Went by and checked out the tree and oh yeah. Came home and got online and decided to do some searching to see what else I could find out about this tree. So Googled Camphor tree in Clearwater and found a few articles about the tree I am speaking of. Very interesting. I now know the tree is about 125 years old and was planted about 1890 with 3 others on the property of William Frank Fields who I read cleared and built his family a home. The four trees were planted to shade the yard for his children to play. Not sure how big the trees were when he planted them but I am sure he would be quite surprised to see how big the lone survivor is.  So the strange part. Checked out a few other links but then one caught my eye. Clicked on it and realized it was a link to an eBay page. See how we tie back to the eBay thing at the beginning. Love it when everything ties together. I pull up a picture and it is a newspaper photograph from 1971 of the very same tree. I don't know about you but this is weird. I mean isn't it. I just don't know. So does this mean that I am just strange? Or am I to take it as a sign that I am to write these stories and yes this should be the first one. Or does it mean nothing at all?

This is where sometimes over analysing the situation can leave me to do nothing at all because when my mind never turns off sometimes I will over think a situation until I do not want to think about it anymore and let the book idea go. Or is it that I continue to think about it that it is a good idea and I should continue to do more research. So including my Clearwater tree I have 4  stories in the works. I even have a title in my head but someone else uses it as a name of a business so I guess I would have to look into that as well.

So not sure if today I found a sand collar or a diamond ring but I was not looking for either when it appeared.


Tuesday, May 28, 2013

Happy Birthday Gemini

Well today is Memorial Day. The end of this week is my best friend from my teen years birthday and on Sunday will be my husband Brian's.

Funny they are both Gemini. Some words I found that describe them energetic, clever, witty and imagintive.

So most of you know Brian: And if clever and witty isn't that his middle name not sure what is. I also read one of their traits is that they can talk and talk and talk. Well if that is not Brian. Sometimes I am amazed at how much he has to say when we are out with others. And I read that Gemini's make for interesting and exciting friends. We certainly never have a dull moment.

And when I was a teen I worked with this guy Keith. He started working with me on his 16th birthday. For some reason it was a family tradition to work for Eckerd's. His big sister Lisa had made quite a name for herself in the company. Youngest assistant manager, youngest store manager and a girl. This was the early 1980's. Later I would also work with his younger brother Jeff. All of which are friends forever.

Don't know who started it but Keith was referred to as "Cool Keith". Oh if you didn't know him in the 80's he started off with the clean cut look that he has today but then after high school the hair started growing and growing. This was the days of the Hair Bands. Keith had the look. I mean "Cool Keith". Oh and he had the car a 1979? Trans Am. gold of course. Nothing too flashy. Not. I did get to drive it a few times. Once right after it had been painted he had me take it to my house so it would not get scratched in the parking lot while he worked. Those guys and their cars. Oh well I did have a Mustang II and Steve had a Duster. Those were the days. Girls loved that Cool Keith. The hair the car all of it. They would be jealous because of our friendship. That is all it ever was. But it was the best. We both knew we were like siblings.

We both got the chance to work at a tiny AM radio station together in our late teens early 20's. Another dream job. Not very glamourous but it was a fun experience.
 Keith and I were the fastest friends.. I could never have imagined when I met him. I remember him learning how to turn off the lights in the store. My god this kid was full of energy. Really kid next I will teach you how to sweep the floor. How could he get excited over learning how to switch off breakers. You know I was a whole 9 months older than him. We worked together for about 2 years. He and I closed most nights. Midnight back then and got up in the morning and went to school.  How many teens do you know that worked whenever they could. Overtime was a given when available. He and I would pay each other to work when we wanted off like it was a game. Straightening the store and goofing off were one in the same. Everything was a game or a race. Who could do it faster, better and with the least mistakes. And when I say mistakes I mean not catch whatever the other did to stand in the way of your prerfection. We would walk through the other's aisles and see something out of place and think, "He will never find that." and smile. Knowing that at the end of the night we would check each others work and be thrilled to find that they did miss whatever it was. The more out of place the better. The more it mixed in the happier we were.

We would look at the list left for us in the evening and decide a time which we would complete the list by and meet in the pharmacy waiting area and then decide how long we could hide and not get called to the register or not be spotted by the assistant manager.

One time someone had put a greeting card that played happy birthday in the baler and everytime you went in the back room you would hear it over and over until we had to make a bale to get it out of there. The best and stupidest story well I have 2 stupid bale stories. When I was pretty young and I have the scar to show for it. If you couldn't roll the top part from one side to the other you would push down whatever was stopping it with one arm and pull with the other. Putting one arm in the way of the metal rollers. Get the idea. My one arm got caught in the metal roller and did it leave a mark. And the oh so caring assistant told me something along the lines of guess you won't do that again. But one night Keith was hiding from work and had climbed inside the baler and pulled the smashing part over the top of himself part way of course so that the saftey release was still pushed in and it would not go down. I scared him to death by pressing the button which just made a sound but he came jumping out. We had to be crazy right.

Now I know this all sounds like fun and games but there was a lot of putting away shoes and filling combi loungers and my god the coolers. I think then we may have had 8 doors. We couldn't keep them filled to save our lives. This was Clearwater Beach  in the 80's. Our Saturday's were fill the chairs, fill the coolers, fill the shoes, fill the chairs again and set the ad. Don't forget whomever was doomed to the register was trapped in a cage. At first everyone has to run the register but as you had been there for a while you could find your freedom in the store. Freedom to work until you could not work anymore. But in the same right you could play until you got caught. Did I mention everything was a game. We were teenagers. It wasn't just me and Keith but Steve, Margie, Karen, Nelson, Shawn, Kim, Valerie, Cindy, Tracy and the God Father to all of us, Frank.

Frank taught us everything we know about retail and I am sure the lot of us know quite a bit about it even if we never straighten a shelf for pay again in our lives. We know that he knew how to make that store run like a well oiled machine and he could do it all from the parking meter out front with a cigarette in one hand and a cup of coffee in the other. Later after I had been there a while he would joke that I was the worst employee he ever had. Well I had never worked before in a store and his way of teaching was not exactly the hand holding type. It was more do it right or don't do it at all. Even if you have no idea how the right way to do it is. You will figure it out quick or you got yelled at again.

Oh the best Frank story I have is the day we found out that he was getting transferred and Keith's sister Lisa was going to be the new manager. I was devistated. I did not know Lisa at the time except for that she was his sister but I knew that meant Keith and I could not work together anymore at that store. Siblings could not work together. So I knew he would be transferred as well. I was so sad. I cried. Frank and I were standing out back and I was crying and he was smoking and he said can just one of those tears be for me. I smiled and said yeah I guess.

All the friendships from then that I still have I cherish. I don't imagine any of us will ever have the fun we had then. We even knew it was fun then. And not many kids today or even back then realize the friends they make at their first jobs are better than friends from school and the influences they have on your life (I do not still have any friends from school) but friends from Eckerd I can count them name them and now we have all been friends for more than 20 years almost pushing 30 and remember resets and floor cleaning and making bales and filling shoes with a smile on my face.  Not always a smile when doing shoes but when you were teaching someone new how to do it and could walk away. That was when we smiled. 15 boxes of shoes. Have them all put up and straightened. See you later I will be back in the pharmacy hiding from this real work.

Now I wanted this blog to be about my friend Keith  and our friendship but I see there was a lot that made Keith and I friends. All of the funny stories which had to do with working together. But I also realized that this is about lasting relationships. Of the people I listed earlier and me 4 of us married someone we met working with them at Eckerd. Margie married Scott, Cindy married Frank, Lisa married Erik and I married Brian.

So I am tying this back to what Brian and Keith have in common. The day I met Brian was 7 years to the day after I had met Keith. I met Brian in the back room of the same Eckerd.  It was his first day working in the same Clearwater Beach store. Hired by my dear friend Lisa (Keith's sister). Funny thing Brian had a rat tail hanging off the back of his head and Lisa had recommended that he lose it before he started working. I promise I would not looked twice at a guy with a rat tail.  Next day Lisa tells him he cleans up pretty good. I come in to visit my friend Lisa and here is this new guy who is a smart ass, know it all and I start talking to him. A few days later would be his birthday and we went out and played a game of darts together. This Brian guy and I were friends right away. Like nothing I had seen in a long time. And 5 years later we were married. Funny how fate and Eckerd brought all of us together.

So today I say Happy Birthday Keith. My dear friend. Whom I never talk to but feel as close to as the days we worked together and got ice cream at Howard Johnson's with Steve and Margie after work and the day you and Steve pulled the ladder out from under me up on top the office where the paper supplies were. I smile anytime I tell an Eckerd story and think of the fun and the work and how we learned to do both really well together.  And I think of the fate and magic how the stars had to align for all of us to meet and work together and become friends and some of us got married and even had kids. All started with two teenagers meeting in May of 1984. Amazing.

Happy Birthday Keith and Brian. Love you both.