Back at Thanksgiving I wrote about the holiday and the kids that live across the street. These kids live in a group home. We have lived across the street from this group home for 17 years so those kids back then probably have kids of their own by now. The thing I wrote about at Thanksgiving was my frustration with the kids and the people that worked there. How within the month of November I guessed the police had been out 30 times to the house. I under estimated by a lot. It was more than 60 times. My frustration made me take action and after visiting the police station and actually being told if there was anything wrong they would be shut down. Give me a break if the cops have been at the same address 60 times in one month the least there is, is something wrong.
Well today I am sitting in my front window and the kids are playing tether ball and yesterday I actually saw one of the adults that worked there out playing ball with the kids in the street. Now I know some of you think I am crazy but I wanted to walk out and say Thanks... So this morning as I started to sit down at the computer I thought I have some outdoor toys in the garage. I went out and found them and took them over. The boys that were out playing I asked if they could check with someone that worked there to see if I could give the toys to them. They came back out with the same adult that was out playing with them yesterday. I explained that I live across the street and I appreciate the work they are doing and the improvements that have been made. I handed over the stuff to the boys and they said thank you and have a nice day.
I did ask the adult if there was anything they needed and if so to let me know and I said we live just across the street. I explained my experiences and he had not worked there back in November but he knows what I am referring to.
To say that I was pleased would be an understatement.
The thing I wanted to write about is life experiences and that some are different than others and just because people don't have the same experiences that you did doesn't make them less of a person. It just makes them different. Those boys don't have parents that love them in the traditional sense. I don't know if they do at all, but I know that people care and those kids know who they are.
People with children always say they want better for their kids. Better by the standards of which they were brought up. If you grew up working hard maybe you want your kids to play more. Maybe my childhood I worried to much about others and I would hope that if I had a kid they wouldn't have to worry but that wouldn't mean I wouldn't want them to work hard and play hard. Everything in proportion. I know that kids today don't have responsibilities and I understand the world is different than when I was a kid. I am pretty sure what I would want my kid to be able to do is different than others. Kids need to know right from wrong and there are consequences. They need to learn who they can trust and how to manage money. These are the things that will make your kids good adults.
When my nieces and nephew were young I would hold them and talk to them like they were adults. Telling them things about making good choices and things I wanted to do with them when they got older. My one sister came home and asked what I was doing. I said, telling them all the things they won't want me to when they are older. God, I love those kids. I teased my nephew he had to love me more than his mom so he would take care of me when I get old. I don't think my mother or grandmother thought that way but after taking care of both at the end of their lives I know how important it is to have someone that cares taking care of you.
I know I have covered a bunch of subjects but while you are home with your kids maybe show them how to pay the bills. They don't have to know that you worry about where the money is coming from just show them that it is due and you have to pay it. The rest they will learn in time.
Showing posts with label work. Show all posts
Showing posts with label work. Show all posts
Saturday, April 11, 2020
Thursday, August 16, 2018
Things Change
I always find it funny the thing, that has me laying in bed thinking and the next thought is, "Get up it is 3AM and you need to write that down." Everyone lays in bed at one time or another questioning in their mind a decision they are trying to make or just made. Me, being the over thinking type not only have to go through every possible reason to make a decision, then once the decision is made have to think of every reason I should have not made the decision. Then there is Rule #39, "There is no such thing as coincidence." Who's Rules? Gibbs' Rules. NCIS has been part of our lives for 15 years now and Brian's go to re-run to watch during the day on TV. I like Gibbs character the best and his rules. Seems they follow the same moral compass that my life follows. I think the rule that got me was #51 sometimes you are wrong. I have had a hard time with this in myself but I guess if Gibbs can be wrong every now and then so can I. Rule #9 Brian's favorite Never go anywhere without a knife.
Well enough of what got me out of bed and on to what I was thinking about. Last Thursday at work I was asked to make a change. A change I said, I would never make, just about an hour before I was asked to make it. Then the weekend of pondering, even list writing the pros and cons, why I should or should not make the change. But then Friday I was asked to do something outside of work that coincided with this change at work. Which made me think well maybe I should make that change. (For those of you that know how my mind thinks at this time of the night, Michael Jackson's song Man in the Mirror just popped into my head. Make that Change...The funny thing is the not wanting to change upset me. Because in my mind this change well I had made it before. I made it for mom and now to change again...Well was I leaving mom behind. I know to some there is no logic. Mom passed away more than two years ago. But it seems as life goes by there she is. And when I say it upset me I didn't even know what was the part that upset me until a friend at work that asked the question, "what is the reason you don't want to change?" The tears rolled down my face. Mom! Just like now after I have made my decision. Stuck my neck out, I am going to try something new that I have been told that I will be good at. Here is the other thing. When you are really good at something it is hard to go on to something else that you don't know. Right now anyone ask me a routing question? How do you get rid of all the jobs? How do you know who to give them to? To me it is logic and magic rolled into one. And I am really good at it. I am not the fastest or the smartest. But I am really good at putting jobs on techs in what to me is fair and logical way. And I use my magic to fix the problems the techs have.They call in and say they have already talked to 3 different people and they couldn't solve but in less than two minutes I get that customer's TV on or their modem to be online. There is one tech that when he hear "Dispatch, this is Jeanne", the first thing out of his mouth is "Thank God it is you." Here is the kicker I really love it. I love fixing things and solving problems. I don't need to be the smartest or the fastest but I am really good at what I do so why in the world would I change?
As we all know everything changes. Not me but everything around me. And that is it. I don't like change. I am perfectly happy being perfectly happy, with what I have and where I am but then there is that part of me that can be better. I mean it took years before I could loose one pound and somehow over the past couple years I have lost nearly 50. I am never the hare but always the tortoise in the race. Slow and steady. But when these two opportunities came up at the same time and the one made me think well if I try that, then I can try this and I want to try this. I know I am vague but see nothing has been said at work or outside work for that matter and not that I have a bunch of work friends that read this but I like to keep things to me for now. Maybe not wanting to mess up the magic that brought both these opportunities together at the same time. So I am going to try both. Mom would be proud of me for the outside of work opportunity. And she and I would have adjusted to the other Like said, I made this change before see, I used to eat dinner with her every Wednesday night but then when I started working at night that changed. Neither of us liked that we wouldn't have that but then we had Friday. Friday was my day off that Brian usually had to work. So I would take her and grandma where ever they needed to go and go to lunch and the thrift store and even though I haven't done those things in years that is why I have off of Friday and Saturday. But starting next week that will change. Even now after sitting here for an hour thinking about this the tears roll down my face. Funny how people have an affect on me. Even when they aren't here. Man I miss her.
Sunday, March 12, 2017
Good-bye friend
So I learned a secret last week at work. A secret that the person that I sat next to had gave their notice and was leaving. Now in the three years I have sat at my desk this person has sat by me for maybe a year and a half.
I feel as though I have lost a friend. Not the friend that you gossip about work or the friend that you eat lunch with but this is the friend that at the end of the night while my mom was sick I would cry to in the middle of the parking lot about how hard it is to take care of her and this person listened. Listened in the way only a person who had been a caregiver of a sick relative can listen. Listen as only a person who had walked more miles in those shoes than I would have a chance to. Listen like a life long friend.
This person was so private and yet so giving. Sharing only what had to be shared but always knowing what had to be shared. Not giving away too much. So this very private person told the management not to let others know that notice had been given. And in return they didn't. So no fanfare for a partner in crime or no cake or cookies to be had. Just a quiet good-bye at the end of the night with post it notes exchanged with phone numbers between us.
I actually had a dream last night of what it will be like tomorrow when I go in and the desk is empty. I already know because I had a call at the end of the night that kept me later so my dream was pretty close.
In the world of work I know there is no time for grieving for the loss of a comrade. Just one of the newer people will be given that desk and and they will wipe it down and adjust the chair and put up their name on the wall and it will become theirs. This is the part of working in a place where turn over is part of life and it is a part I don't care for. Back in my Eckerd days I was known to not be open to new people and basically because they wouldn't stick it out for the long haul. In my almost 33 working years I have worked for 3 companies full time. 21 years at the first, 6 years at the second and now I have been here 5. At Eckerds my friends had all been around and I am still friends with them and most of us would still be at those jobs had CVS not closed the office we worked at. I know I am a good employee but good employee's don't last forever and change is so hard. And no matter how hard I work I worry that the job I do well just may not be good enough.
Seems today people think a job is like well everything in life is replaceable. And I the employee well I am replaceable as well. I mean if all you have to do is wipe down a desk and adjust a chair who's to say my chair won't be taken up by another new person another day. My friend next to me was hired by my supervisors but had to be a gift from God. I wish I could share all the laughs in our corner and all the tears. I am usually the one listening to people's stories and trying to guide them along their path but this person my friend was definitely sent to show me that I could move on and that I could change. And that life can be good maybe not in the way it was good before but good none the less.
I know there are some that are thinking well that person is probably moving on to better things. And knowing this person the way I do which really is not at all. That person will be fine. See I thought about calling this post by the person's name and I thought about using letters of the person's name through out the blog to be clever but this person is so much more clever than that. So instead I will not give away the sex or the age or any other clue of the person that sat next to me. I will only say to the next person that shares a space with this person will be the lucky one.
Good Luck my friend in whatever you do and know that you will not soon be forgotten in my little corner of the office.
I feel as though I have lost a friend. Not the friend that you gossip about work or the friend that you eat lunch with but this is the friend that at the end of the night while my mom was sick I would cry to in the middle of the parking lot about how hard it is to take care of her and this person listened. Listened in the way only a person who had been a caregiver of a sick relative can listen. Listen as only a person who had walked more miles in those shoes than I would have a chance to. Listen like a life long friend.
This person was so private and yet so giving. Sharing only what had to be shared but always knowing what had to be shared. Not giving away too much. So this very private person told the management not to let others know that notice had been given. And in return they didn't. So no fanfare for a partner in crime or no cake or cookies to be had. Just a quiet good-bye at the end of the night with post it notes exchanged with phone numbers between us.
I actually had a dream last night of what it will be like tomorrow when I go in and the desk is empty. I already know because I had a call at the end of the night that kept me later so my dream was pretty close.
In the world of work I know there is no time for grieving for the loss of a comrade. Just one of the newer people will be given that desk and and they will wipe it down and adjust the chair and put up their name on the wall and it will become theirs. This is the part of working in a place where turn over is part of life and it is a part I don't care for. Back in my Eckerd days I was known to not be open to new people and basically because they wouldn't stick it out for the long haul. In my almost 33 working years I have worked for 3 companies full time. 21 years at the first, 6 years at the second and now I have been here 5. At Eckerds my friends had all been around and I am still friends with them and most of us would still be at those jobs had CVS not closed the office we worked at. I know I am a good employee but good employee's don't last forever and change is so hard. And no matter how hard I work I worry that the job I do well just may not be good enough.
Seems today people think a job is like well everything in life is replaceable. And I the employee well I am replaceable as well. I mean if all you have to do is wipe down a desk and adjust a chair who's to say my chair won't be taken up by another new person another day. My friend next to me was hired by my supervisors but had to be a gift from God. I wish I could share all the laughs in our corner and all the tears. I am usually the one listening to people's stories and trying to guide them along their path but this person my friend was definitely sent to show me that I could move on and that I could change. And that life can be good maybe not in the way it was good before but good none the less.
I know there are some that are thinking well that person is probably moving on to better things. And knowing this person the way I do which really is not at all. That person will be fine. See I thought about calling this post by the person's name and I thought about using letters of the person's name through out the blog to be clever but this person is so much more clever than that. So instead I will not give away the sex or the age or any other clue of the person that sat next to me. I will only say to the next person that shares a space with this person will be the lucky one.
Good Luck my friend in whatever you do and know that you will not soon be forgotten in my little corner of the office.
Wednesday, May 27, 2015
Fate
Today I learned something new about fate. Well, new to me. Fate is as old as Greek Mythology. Fate is a family business. Three sisters that control destiny. Three sisters. I have three sisters. I do not think they were the three sisters mythology was talking about. So as I learned this morning these three sisters hold the thread of life. The first is the spinner of the thread when a baby is born and the second is the one that measured the length of thread and the third she cut the thread when one dies.
As some believe these three come to a new baby on the third night after being born and determine the child's fate. This is an interesting idea for me the worrier. I know they say you can beat fate but I have seen all the Final Destination movies. I knew right away in the first once you hear John Denver music it is all over for you. But there were a few that beat their fate but sooner or later I guess those sisters right the wrong that has happened and they get you. As the saying goes if you can't beat them, join them. So why worry. I make my choices and try to make everything right but in the end the end is the end and I can not change it. This may seem fatalistic. See look there is the word fate. stuck at the beginning. So today I want to write about some fate that I feel has been for the better. See sometimes when things happen it could seem terrible but in the end it was what had to happen so that the stars could align for something else to happen. That is how I think of fate.
Two things made me start thinking about this last night. I just recently dropped off a wedding album to a dear friend of mine who got married a month ago.I was so glad I could share his special moment with him and his new wife and family. Small wedding at the courthouse then we went to the Botanical Gardens and took some beautiful pictures. The next day they had a barbecue picnic reception. It was great to see old friends that we had not seen in a while and new family members. So the fate that got us to that point I guess now that I know the definition is not fate but maybe Devine intervention. But when I got fired from my last job she was the person they hired. And that is how he and she met. See I had to loose my job so she could get the job so they could meet and get married. That was a lot of work to get those two together. Now I have always said that loosing that job was the best thing that ever happened to me. Well now that makes three.
The second thing that had me thinking about Fate last night was that at work I had my monthly review. Now if I go back over the last year I have cried during more of these reviews than I care to admit but over the last few months no tears. It was not that I was upset by what they said it was the fear of what they could say. See for a long time I have still lived in fear of whomever is speaking to me from a boss point of view because of the boss at that job that I got fired from. Well my last supervisor who is the boss type that scares some people. I told him I like a boss that tells it like it is. I used to work for an awesome lady at Eckerd that most would have not wanted for a boss but for me I liked that as long as you did what you were supposed to be doing she left you to do it. If you had a question you better ask that was what she was there for and when you made a mistake she let you know. Well this last supervisor of mine was very similar in his ways. And he encouraged me to be more self confident and after the last shift bid which I cried because I was worried I would not get the shift I needed so I could still take care of my mom on Fridays like I have been for the last year. I got the days off but have had to work until 10 which gave me extra time at night when it was slow to take some online classes which Bright house offers. I decided that I would take ones that had to do with self confidence and with working with different types of people. I have taken 16 such courses over the last 5 months and I have seen a noticeable difference in my perception of others around me and of myself. I have learned about traits that I have and how to resolve conflicts better and how not to be defensive when someone is being critical and how to take ownership of my own mistakes and move on. Not to dwell on them. So the supervisor I have now only recently got promoted to supervisor and she has take me on with the approach to help build my self confidence by reassuring me that I do a good job almost daily. Both of them have encouraged me to do things that I might have not wanted to do but only because I lacked the confidence to do it. So as we started to go over my six month review she asked me first how I thought I did. I told her I thought I meet expectations but could do better. I do enough to get by but should be able to do more. Just getting by. She said really. Just getting by. Well then she said what my rank was for this shift bid and I was surprised. I thought I would be in the middle of the pack hopefully ranked high enough to still have my Friday Saturday off so I could still help my mom. But ready to deal with whatever came my way. No tears of worry. Just gonna do what I have to do to get things taken care of. Then she told me that I do not just skate by that I do an outstanding job not just a meets. So I got to pick the shift I wanted and no tears were shed. I get embarrassed as people say things that are good about me. To me it is just doing my job nothing extra. But she assured me that it is and that the classes I have taken have helped me a lot at work.
A lot of things have come together recently for me both in my head and in real life. They are two totally different things. In my head I usually go through every worse case scenario before whatever is going to happen happens and then realize that it is not always going to be the bad thing that is going to happen. Sometimes as with recently there are good things going to happen. I am glad I am more receptive to the good things and worry less about what could happen.
So I am good with the three sisters of Fate. They have already spun my thread and measured its length now I have to do the best I can with the time I have and not worry about hearing the John Denver music. When it comes it comes.
As some believe these three come to a new baby on the third night after being born and determine the child's fate. This is an interesting idea for me the worrier. I know they say you can beat fate but I have seen all the Final Destination movies. I knew right away in the first once you hear John Denver music it is all over for you. But there were a few that beat their fate but sooner or later I guess those sisters right the wrong that has happened and they get you. As the saying goes if you can't beat them, join them. So why worry. I make my choices and try to make everything right but in the end the end is the end and I can not change it. This may seem fatalistic. See look there is the word fate. stuck at the beginning. So today I want to write about some fate that I feel has been for the better. See sometimes when things happen it could seem terrible but in the end it was what had to happen so that the stars could align for something else to happen. That is how I think of fate.
Two things made me start thinking about this last night. I just recently dropped off a wedding album to a dear friend of mine who got married a month ago.I was so glad I could share his special moment with him and his new wife and family. Small wedding at the courthouse then we went to the Botanical Gardens and took some beautiful pictures. The next day they had a barbecue picnic reception. It was great to see old friends that we had not seen in a while and new family members. So the fate that got us to that point I guess now that I know the definition is not fate but maybe Devine intervention. But when I got fired from my last job she was the person they hired. And that is how he and she met. See I had to loose my job so she could get the job so they could meet and get married. That was a lot of work to get those two together. Now I have always said that loosing that job was the best thing that ever happened to me. Well now that makes three.
The second thing that had me thinking about Fate last night was that at work I had my monthly review. Now if I go back over the last year I have cried during more of these reviews than I care to admit but over the last few months no tears. It was not that I was upset by what they said it was the fear of what they could say. See for a long time I have still lived in fear of whomever is speaking to me from a boss point of view because of the boss at that job that I got fired from. Well my last supervisor who is the boss type that scares some people. I told him I like a boss that tells it like it is. I used to work for an awesome lady at Eckerd that most would have not wanted for a boss but for me I liked that as long as you did what you were supposed to be doing she left you to do it. If you had a question you better ask that was what she was there for and when you made a mistake she let you know. Well this last supervisor of mine was very similar in his ways. And he encouraged me to be more self confident and after the last shift bid which I cried because I was worried I would not get the shift I needed so I could still take care of my mom on Fridays like I have been for the last year. I got the days off but have had to work until 10 which gave me extra time at night when it was slow to take some online classes which Bright house offers. I decided that I would take ones that had to do with self confidence and with working with different types of people. I have taken 16 such courses over the last 5 months and I have seen a noticeable difference in my perception of others around me and of myself. I have learned about traits that I have and how to resolve conflicts better and how not to be defensive when someone is being critical and how to take ownership of my own mistakes and move on. Not to dwell on them. So the supervisor I have now only recently got promoted to supervisor and she has take me on with the approach to help build my self confidence by reassuring me that I do a good job almost daily. Both of them have encouraged me to do things that I might have not wanted to do but only because I lacked the confidence to do it. So as we started to go over my six month review she asked me first how I thought I did. I told her I thought I meet expectations but could do better. I do enough to get by but should be able to do more. Just getting by. She said really. Just getting by. Well then she said what my rank was for this shift bid and I was surprised. I thought I would be in the middle of the pack hopefully ranked high enough to still have my Friday Saturday off so I could still help my mom. But ready to deal with whatever came my way. No tears of worry. Just gonna do what I have to do to get things taken care of. Then she told me that I do not just skate by that I do an outstanding job not just a meets. So I got to pick the shift I wanted and no tears were shed. I get embarrassed as people say things that are good about me. To me it is just doing my job nothing extra. But she assured me that it is and that the classes I have taken have helped me a lot at work.
A lot of things have come together recently for me both in my head and in real life. They are two totally different things. In my head I usually go through every worse case scenario before whatever is going to happen happens and then realize that it is not always going to be the bad thing that is going to happen. Sometimes as with recently there are good things going to happen. I am glad I am more receptive to the good things and worry less about what could happen.
So I am good with the three sisters of Fate. They have already spun my thread and measured its length now I have to do the best I can with the time I have and not worry about hearing the John Denver music. When it comes it comes.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)